The Risk of Love

Once upon a time, I had a good friend. I was friends with this person for quite some time, then things went totally south. Naturally, this hurt. At the same time I was beginning my conversion to Catholicism, they were also converting to an anti-Catholic religion. I’m sure you can understand the friction that developed. Despite trying to explain Catholicism, this person was closed off to listening and basically; we stopped speaking all together.

However. This person started having hard times, and had emailed me for advice. We resumed talking, and I was completely overjoyed. This person is a good person, a great friend, a good listener, and a lot of fun to be around with. I was expecting that despite our beliefs, we could get along and we would be friends again – maybe not Best Friends For Ever but you know, someone to talk to, to discuss what we do have in common in belief, that sort of thing.

As of last night, I have come to the realization that that won’t ever happen. Things are beginning to erode, and go back to how they were before we just stopped talking all together. I don’t think this person was taking advantage of me, and I was and am more than happy to provide support when it’s needed. But as I was thinking about this whole situation, it dawned on me. This is the risk of love: to give something of yourself – in this case, what I had told this person before things got weird, a situation I had gone through that I thought would help them see where I was coming from; only to get totally trashed in return. I went into this ordeal expecting that we would be able to put the differences aside, and came out realizing that even though we didn’t (couldn’t?); that I got the realization of what Love vs. love is: vulnerability. I hate making myself vulnerable, but only authentic love has that vulnerability.

Our Lord showed us that Love – He gave something much more than an ear and a discussion; He gave His Life. And so many people reject Him, His Church, His Life, everything about Him – but He still did it.

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to shut out this friend of my life totally. While I won’t be actively seeking them out, if they should need me; I’ll be here. I love them too much to write them off all together.