A Few Thoughts on Homemaking
Posted on | February 25, 2010
by | Kim
Exspectantes posted a post yesterday afternoon that really has me thinking. Her thoughts on making a home, especially why it’s so important to her.
I suppose this isn’t shocking to anyone, but my mom is the typical ‘Type A personality’ (which is something her and I get a lot of laughs out of). I’m somewhat Type A, but not to the extreme my mom is. Growing up, I remember coming home from school and finding her washing the ceiling, the walls, that sort of thing. She stayed home with us kids until we were in school, then worked part-time. Somehow, she ALWAYS found time (and energy!) to keep the house in amazing condition. Now that I am All Grown Up and Taking Care Of My Own House, I’m shocked at how much there is to keeping a house. She made it look so easy.
I suppose most people think that my need for keeping house is somehow tied up in my growing up environment (kind of – I hate clutter but I will NOT be washing my walls; unless it’s delinting the bathroom – and even that is just using a dry rag) or the fact that as a stay at home Mama, I’m bored and therefore keeping house is something to do. Or that I have some weird fantasy that’s rooted in deep nostalgia and keeping house is a way of venting that. For me, keeping house – cleaning it, making meals, clutter control and so on – is more than just making it safe for us to live in or not be tripping over all sorts of stuff. Greg and I are firm believers in the sense that the home is more than just a place to sleep, eat, and stay clean; but rather a place to come and retreat to. A place where everyone may not get along all the time, but we all love each other immensely and are a family.
The things that are required of me to run the house, I try to remember to do those as little acts of love. Much like St. Therese of Lisieux’s “little way” – doing the most mundane (and sometimes smelly tasks) with love. It doesn’t make things smell better or be less boring; but it helps to keep my focus as to WHY I am actually doing what I am doing. Delinting the bathroom isn’t high up on my list of likes (shocking, I know) but doing so keeps us from breathing lint and avoids that “did I just walk into a belly button?” feeling. And I know no one will be all “Wow, Mama, you delinted the bathroom! Thank you!” but just knowing that it’s clean for them is enough. Running the house takes my focus off of meeeeeeeeeeee and puts it where it belongs – on my family. It’s a constant self-sacrifice.
Sometimes, I do lose focus and things tend to pile up around here. Sometimes I let things go and make sure we’re clean and fed – I’ve been in that mode all week, actually. Clean clothes, clean dishes, food, no safety hazards, check. Part of the self-sacrifice is letting go of my perfectionistic tendencies and letting things be if I can’t physically do it, or ask Greg to help me out. It’s all about balance, which of course is right up my alley.
Running the house is more than something “to do” or something I have to do, even. It’s a way for me to show love in little, unseen ways; to root out things like perfectionism and pride, and live my vocation fully.
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